Chatper 393


    Chapter 0393


    After the announcements werepleted, I stayed behind to privately speak to Nichs. When the


    other girls cleared the room, I said, “Thank you for the rescue.”


    “It seemed the other girls were ready to fight for you,” Nichs said.


    “They were,” I agreed. “But so was my wolf.”


    His face suddenly became more guarded. “Oh.”


    “Your entrance was timely.”


    “I’m d then,” he said. Then he cleared his throat. That was odd. So too was his inability to look me in


    the eye.


    “Nick?”


    “I may or may not have been keeping tabs on you. Just to make sure you are okay.”


    “Which is it?” I asked. “May or may not.”


    He cleared his throat again. “May.”


    Maybe I should have been upset that he was tailing me around. Instead, I just felt relieved. I had nearly


    lost myself, after all. I would have hated to hurt Jessica. She simply cared about Joyce. That shouldn’t


    have been a crime punished with a ck eye. Or worse.


    Nichs watched me with a careful eye. “Are you okay?”


    “I don’t know,” J admitted. “It feels like me and my wolf are at war with each other over control of my


    body. I know it’s not on purpose. We aren’t enemies. We just aren’t used to each other. I also suspect


    that Jane kept her on a shorter leash. Miracle doesn’t know what to do with the freedom I give her.”


    Nichs nodded. “Hopefully you will learn to coexist sooner rather thanter.”


    “We’ve both changed since we werest together,” I said. It was difficult to exin. It was like seeing a


    friend after a long time apart. We needed time to reconnect. Once we did, I was sure we would fall


    together like we had never been separated. But first we had to make it through that learning curve.


    “I wouldn’t say you’ve changed all that much,” Nichs said. He gave me his rakish smile, the one he


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    often used when we were young and in love. He was being cute, but he had changed also. We’d all


    grown since then.


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    But we didn’t have to grow apart.


    “Keep at it,” Nichs said. “Veronica told us that you and the wolf are meshing well. She said this is a


    I shuddered at the thought. “I will never give up my wolf again.”


    Inside me, Miracle grunted her agreement. Now that we’d found each other again, we would be


    together for life.


    We’d get through this patch.


    Unfortunately, I had more worries than just my own inner turmoil.


    “You heard the end of the announcements,” I said. “The rankings.”


    He’d been kind not to have any reaction to them, but the fact remained that I was no the lowest ranking


    of the all the candidates. I couldn’t exactly me the judges. I had disappeared halfway through the


    event and not returned.


    “Do you think I’ll be eliminated?” I asked.


    “I won’t let that happen,” Nichs said.


    I wanted to believe him, but if fair was fair, the bottom of the pack would be the first to go. My sole


    purpose here was for public image, but even that was under fire. Joyce’sments surely didn’t paint


    me in a great light.


    Then there were the protestors who considered me a traitor.


    Maybe my purpose here had been served. Maybe the King would want me to leave.


    At once, Nichs clutched me by the shoulders. He dipped his head until he met my gaze, then held it


    prisoner with his own.


    “Do not worry about the elimination,” Nichs said in his most serious, earnest voice. The one that left


    no room for argument. “Julian and I are in your corner every step of the way.”


    I wanted to believe him. I knew he meant the words, to have said them like that. But I also knew there


    woulde a time when no amount of bluster would save me from what was toe.


    Truthfully, I was not meant to be a Queen, despite how much my wolf argued with me. Eventually, a


    time woulde when I would have to step to the side to let the true Luna reign.


    For the sake of the kingdom, I would have to give Nichs up. And Julian? I


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    would never stand in the way of him finding his own true love.


    Deep down, Nichs understood that. He had to, since he had openly acknowledged he would never


    give up the crown.


    In moments like this, where he let his heart take the lead, he reminded me so much of the boy from


    years ago that I had fallen so deeply in love with. So idealistic and hopeful. He looked forward and


    could see a future worth fighting for. One that held love.


    Age and the weight of the crown had weighed heavily on him in our years apart. He was still handsome


    as ever, if not more so. asionally, I would see the idealistic boy within him. Yet just as often, I saw


    his father.


    A King did nothing selfishly. He lived and breathed for the sake of the kingdom.


    When Nichs wore the crown, he would do the same.


    And I would disappear from him life.


    I watched him now, as the realization came over his face, darkening his features.


    Nichs, so earnest and true, wanted to protect me forever. But he knew he couldn’t.


    “You have a wolf now,” he said. “If I can train you


    “Like our self-defense lessons?” I asked.


    and your


    your wolf…”


    “More intense,” he admitted. “Self-defense was about making enough time to escape. With your wolf…


    and with its strength… You might have a shot of fighting


    back.”


    Fighting back? Go d, how long had I lived in fear of every shadow in the dark. Of every lingering eye,


    and errant hand.


    Too many people tried to ost me, grabbed my as s, or threatened me for money or sex.


    I’d denied them all, sometimes to my detriment. Sometimes sheer luck was the only way I made it


    through.


    But now, with my wolf… Yes, maybe I could have the strength to finally defend myself.


    I wanted to stay by Nichs’s side for as long as possible, but when the time came for me to go my


    way, it would be nice to have that advantage.


    “I can’t shield you forever,” Nichs said. “But if I train you and your wolf, you should be able to shield


    yourself and Elva.”


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    Oh, G od. Elva. A whole new wave of worries washed over me. Elva was developing her own wolf, and


    it was powerful. As strong as I might be, did I dare hope to help her learn and keep her safe when the


    whole of the underground would be after her?


    I started to tremble.


    Nichs noticed and pulled me into his arms at once. I breathed him in, trying to find focus.


    Inside, my wolf suffered no such insecurities.


    “If theye for our mate or our pup,” Miracle growled in my head, “We will fight them with fang and


    w. They will know our wrath.”1


    I tried to tell her that I haven’t fought in so long, and even then, it had only been pretend.


    “Maybe you haven’t fought,” Miracle said. “But I have.”